The "proof" process – A Call for Help

One of the most difficult things for me to do with my writing is to "proof" the final product. It's very hard for me to drill down into the small details of my writing after I have spent so much energy and time with the creation of the characters and story. I do not have the advantage of being able to pay for professional editors/proofreaders – though some of my good friends have done their best and given me good feedback. You know who you are – thank you! However, it's clear that I cannot continue to call on the same people every time. Proofing takes a lot of effort.

Therefore, what often happens is that I go ahead and publish my books knowing that there may be some grammatical, punctuation, or even content errors within the pages. I do my best to find them, but at some point (usually the third or fourth draft) I figure "it is what it is." I'm not sure if this is a good strategy or not, but it is where I am today.

However, there is one wonderful advantage of self-publishing which allows me to remedy this situation somewhat. I am the author and the publisher. There are no literary agents or publishing houses to work with. No contracts. No restrictions. No additional fees. I have complete control over the creation, distribution and publishing process. Therefore, I can revise, reformat, and republish new versions or editions my books whenever I want.

This is what I'm doing with my very first published book, Dolphins Dance. I will soon publish a completely rewritten second edition of the story. I also plan to correct some errors brought to my attention in The Scent of Ginger. This will be just a new version, not a full on second edition.

—Which brings me to this current call for help...

If you have read, or will be reading, any of my books and you come across a grammatical or punctuation error, or just something that seems awkward – please let me know about it. I take all feedback very seriously and most gratefully. Please contact me by e-mail if you have any suggestions or feedback – rraker@hawaii.rr.com

Update on "The Scent of Ginger" sales

The Scent of Ginger has done very well so far. I'm not bragging, but thrilled to be able to share this type of data with my friends and supporters.

Since publication in January:

Kindle sales                                                                12

Kindle borrowed books through Amazon Prime       3

Kindle free promotion                                                651

Paperback                                                                   5

This is the best/most sales for one of my books so far. Please keep the trend going by writing a review on Amazon.com and by recommending my stories to your friends. Thank you so much for your continued support and encouragement!

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1494880415

Please contact me by e-mail if you have any suggestions or feedback – rraker@hawaii.rr.com

Thoughts on balance

I've lost my writing imagination-mojo the last couple of weeks. I've stopped working on my numerous stories in progress, and adding posts to my blogs has become difficult and laborious. The words are not flowing as easily. I think I know why, and I believe that the thrill of writing will come back to me before too long.

It's all a matter of balance, Yin and Yang (陰陽)...

I started writing a little more than four years ago as a counter-reaction to the progression of ALS. I found the intense concentration, control and energy derived through the writing process to be therapeutic and absolutely contrary to the loss that the disease was bringing to my life. I've written about this several times before, but I believe that the reaction was physically, emotionally and spiritually real. It evolved as a natural duality, as simple and complex as light and dark, fire and water, life and death. My newly found skills applying the written word are a perfect example of the ancient Chinese concept of yin-yang—opposite forces are interconnected and give rise to each other.

The natural explanation makes sense to me, but the spiritual explanation also exists. The ignition of this new passion and purpose is a gift from God, the Great Spirit and Mother Nature. There is no dichotomy. They sit side-by-side in my mind without effort. The expansion of my imagination and the ability to place these thoughts and ideas on to a blank laptop screen so that I can share them with others, was, and still is, complementary to the frozen condition of my physical self. Together, these two realities form a dynamic system, a new whole which is greater than the parts that existed before. They exist together in a positive space, and bring meaning to each other. I do not view myself as a handicapped person, but I am different. I'm something more than I was before ALS came into my life. I believe that this new state of being is a gift from God, the Universal Spirit of all things. I'm grateful for this gift that I have received.

And so, after four years of intense, sometimes overwhelming effort, I believe that it's natural for me to take a short break. The timing is in perfect alignment with my needs and the journey that I am traveling. This hiatus is another example of yin-yang. The big change that I wrote about in a previous post, my wife staying home with me full-time—is the catalyst. With the excellent physical and emotional care that she gives me, I am able to let my body and mind relax, and seek equilibrium. I'm taking more frequent naps and eating better foods. I have less anxiety, less pain, and less overall uncomfortable symptoms like difficulty breathing and swallowing, congestion, etc. So, as my body adjusts to a new rhythm, my mind is compensating by not firing my writing imagination as often. This does not bother me, I know it's temporary... I can feel my energy slowly coming back. I look forward to the new "voice" that is coming..

On a much lighter note, this blog received 672 page views last month! Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement. Please help me to broaden my readership by sending this link to your friends.

Dolphins Dance cover!

The cover for Dolphins Dance is nearly complete – thank you Daisuke M. You always do a wonderful job! I have yet to finish the revisions for the Second Edition, perhaps by the end of March I will be finished. Many of you know that this book was my original/first published book, but that it was published with a vanity press publisher that forced me into a seven-year contract. That was okay at the beginning, but they set the price way too high for my book that I was embarrassed to ask people to purchase it. They wanted $25 for a paperback! They also seemed to be a scam organization that really made their money from selling the books and their services to the authors, not the public. I did write a short essay that is available on Kindle about my experience with them – it's only $.99 if you're interested in the details.

My Experience Publishing – lessons from a first-time author

So, last year I was finally able to purchase the rights to the book. Now I will self publish with Amazon, and have complete control over pricing, revisions, etc. I hope that some of my readers will be interested in reading my very first story when it is available at a reasonable price.

Adjusting to life's changes

There are events in life that can monumentally change a person's lifestyle, daily routine, life expectations or carefully designed plans. Sometimes these events are expected and sometimes they just happen. Being diagnosed with ALS in 2006, was of course one of those unexpected "events" for my family and me. Since then, we've had to learn to be flexible and adapt to all of the cascading changes, big and small, that have occurred in our lives.

This is a normal and natural state of affairs for most people. Everyone must be flexible and adapt to change. This is a key concept for a happy and healthy life, but for families dealing with illness or tragedy, the changes can be overwhelming and adapting can be a major struggle. I am not an expert on change, but we have found that it helps if we try to predict, prepare for, and control the changes as they come. If we are ready for the change and we have some control over its implementation, it helps to ease the transition. This is not easy, and it's not always possible, but "planning" is one of my strengths – perhaps it's from my early years as a Boy Scout – so, we have prepared for the major change coming soon.

My wife is going to stop working full-time and stay home with me.

She has been working with the same company for over twenty years. For the last five years since I have needed 24-hour care, we have been paying caregivers to be with me during the day while she continued to work. This arrangement had its pros and cons. One of the pros was that my wife was able to continue working. Working gave her a sense of purpose and a feeling of accomplishment outside of the home, and outside of caring for me. It gave us some financial stability and additional help with medical and dental insurance. However, as my disease progressed and my need for care became more acute, a major con began to assert itself – her stress level increased – my stress increased as well.

Other cons began to become apparent. For example, those of you who utilize home care will understand when I say that, "good caregivers are hard to find, and expensive." Even though we had paid help and many volunteers, as time went on, my wife found that she was always busy. She had very little time to herself. She was working less during the day at the office, thanks to a flexible work schedule, Family Medical Leave, and an understanding boss/company, but because of the progression of my disease, I required more care. She continued to be my primary caregiver in the evenings and at night. At the same time, her responsibilities and workload increased, forcing her to work late into the night to keep up. We knew the situation was getting more difficult for her to handle and it was having a detrimental effect on her health – as well as mine.

I felt terribly guilty about the entire situation. She felt extremely stressed out.

After lots of discussion, we decided to make the change. She will continue to work part-time from home, but she will not go into the office. To offset the loss of income, we will discontinue our caregivers, except for one special caregiver, which we will keep for one day a week. This should give my wife the opportunity to get out/away from me for the day and do things that she needs to do for herself. I will ask friends and volunteers to come over several times a week to spend time with me, so that my wife can take a break. We will need everyone's help to make this work.

"Rick's posse" will be reinstated! (More on this in future posts.)

We are hoping the stress level for both of us will be reduced almost immediately. Of course, there will still be things for us to be anxious about – particularly, financial and emotional unknowns. But, my wife will have less work to do and less stuff to worry about. We will have time to reconnect, talk about and do stuff outside of just considering my daily care. We will stay flexible and adjust as we always have when struggling with this terrible disease. I will have the best caregiver possible – my loving wife. She will have time to rest and consider her own health. I will feel less guilty about asking for help. We may even be able to go out on short excursions to the movies, the mall, the beach – which will be wonderful. We will do things together. We will laugh more.

We are prepared. We are in control of this change in our life. I feel positive about the outcome. Wish us luck!

Clarification regarding comments

It has come to my attention that some of my readers have commented on some of my posts and wondered about the status of their comments, so I thought I would quickly clarify the purpose and settings of the comment function on this blog.

In order to clarify the "comment" settings that I have for this blog, I feel as if I should first review the goal/purpose of this endeavor. As the title suggests, the blog is to give my friends, family, supporters and acquaintances across the Internet an opportunity to view the world through Rick's Window. I do this by writing short essays about my experiences living with ALS and some of the activities that I still am able to enjoy from my perspective. I use the blog to share some of my creative writing projects— draft chapters from stories that I am working on, or short "free writing" episodes when I just let my imagination run wild. The blog is also my primary source for marketing my self-published novels, short stories and novellas.

Thus, this blog is not really meant to be a place for sharing opinions, comments or discussion. It's a place where you can go to read about the view from my window on the world... I hope that my writing is informative and perhaps sometimes inspirational— that is my goal.

So, the comment feature is turned off. You may enter a comment, but it does not post publicly. If you are a subscriber to the blog, the comment is sent to my e-mail address inbox, where I will respond to you personally. If you are not a subscriber and you comment, it just goes to an archive folder on the website which I never really look at.

I hope this clarifies how the comments are handled on this blog. If you would like to give me feedback or comments, contact me directly – rraker@hawaii.rr.com.